Paradoxes of Discipleship

by Angela Lambert

carrying-the-cross-daily1

June 19th, 2016; 12th Sunday in Ordinary Time

Gospel of Luke 9:18-24

Once when Jesus was praying by himself, and the disciples were with him, he asked them, “Who do the crowds say that I am?” They said in reply, “John the Baptist; others, Elijah; still others, ‘One of the ancient prophets has arisen.’” Then he said to them, “But who do you say that I am?” Peter said in reply, “The Christ of God.” He scolded them and directed them not to tell this to anyone. He said, “The Son of Man must suffer greatly and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests, and the scribes, and be killed and on the third day be raised.” Then he said to all, “If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.”

 Meditation Reflection:

Often we feel burdened by the frenetic pace of life, even the endless duties of Christian service for our loved ones.  We can easily feel that we do not have time to “just sit and pray.”  As a result we rationalize that our work is our prayer and God wants more from us than mere words.  These thoughts carry quite a bit of merit given their truth.  Nevertheless, they do not abnegate our responsibility to spend time alone with God.  Who could really say he or she has more work to do than the Son of God did during His time on earth?  Who of us can dare say our service cannot wait while we pray alone with God but Christ’s could?  Even Mother Teresa, known for her tireless works of charity, spent several hours in prayer every morning before beginning her service for the poorest of the poor. Angelo Comastri, Archbishop of Loreto, attested to her insistence on the necessity of prayer first, describing his encounter with her in this way:

“She looked at me with two clear and piercing eyes. Then she asked me: «How many hours do you pray a day?» I was surprised by such a question and tried to defend myself by saying: «Mother, I expected you to speak about charity, to invite me to love the poor more. Why do you ask me how many hours I pray?» Mother Teresa took my hands and held them tightly in her own as if she wanted to pass on to me what she had in her heart; then she told me in confidence: «My child, without God we are too poor to be able to help the poor! Remember: I am only a poor woman who prays. When I pray, God puts His Love into my heart and so I can love the poor. By praying!http://www.vatican.va/jubilee_2000/magazine/documents/ju_mag_01091997_p-18_en.html

Time alone with God, especially time spent in silent contemplation or meditation may feel like you are doing nothing whereas in truth an incredible amount is being accomplished in the depths of your soul by God.  In prayer, God fills our souls supernaturally with grace which enables us to know, love, and serve Him in ways we could not without this aid.  For instance, those who had encountered Christ but had not spent time alone with Him like the apostles, had fairly good guesses about Christ’s identity, nevertheless they were wrong.  Peter, however, having dedicated Himself to following Christ and remaining near to Him, was enabled by the Holy Spirit to correctly determine the truth about Jesus.

Moreover, when spending time alone with Christ in silence, He reveals more of Himself to us as well as His mission for us.  After Peter perceived Jesus as the “Christ,” which means “Anointed One,” referring to the long awaited Messiah or “Son of Man” from earlier prophecies, Jesus next revealed the Christ would suffer, die, and be raised to life.  This would not have been the kind of glory the apostles were expecting from their leader.  Without grace, they must have questioned why they chose to follow someone who predicted He would seemingly fail in such a painful way.  He also promised a resurrection but this too would be hard to put in one’s trust without grace.  If that weren’t enough, Jesus went on to disclose an even harder truth: “If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”  Self-denial? Intense suffering?  No marketing agent would put that on a billboard!

We can only make that kind of sacrifice aided by grace to trust that our Lord who suffered, died, and was raised to eternal life in Heaven, will raise us to eternal glory with Him if we endure the suffering and death to our worldly ambitions and sinful attachments on earth.  You only live once so the risk is big.  If Heaven isn’t for real, you won’t have a second chance at the pleasures or the fame the world has to offer.  Time alone with Christ must be a necessity for disciples.  Who do some secular people say Christ is?  A crutch for the weak, a glorified imaginary friend, an old superstition.  Who do disciples of Christ discover He is?  A trusted friend, a vigilant protector, a source of peace, a spring of joy.

In time alone with the one we love, Christ gifts us with the faith, hope, and love necessary to believe and act on His admonition: “For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.”  For example, when in prayer, I felt Jesus call me to the vocation of motherhood, it took some grace and adjustment.  I was young and had more ambitious ideas of how to serve the Lord.  In time alone with Him at adoration however, He revealed to me that I had made some good guesses about the Christian life, but they were still very tainted by a worldly lens.  In time I came to see from His perspective.  I came to have faith but next I needed the hope and love to act on this call, which He provided through more time spent with Him.  I spent my 20’s at home raising my three kids, while my worldly peers pursued careers, partied, and travelled.  From a secular view, I had “no life”.  Sometimes, it even felt like that.  However, I had posted on my refrigerator John 15:13 “Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” When tempted by the worldly lens that I had wasted my talents, I would spend time in prayer.  Without fail, I would walk away each time with the view of the greatness of my mission as a disciple and I felt unworthy of such an honor.  15 years later, I can see concrete examples of how in losing my life Christ saved it.  I can’t articulate the work He has done in my soul through my experience as a mother and my time alone with Christ in the home with my kids for 10 years.  I’m not saying that is His will for everyone.  It was however His will for me and in retrospect I can see why.  When I had finally become truly comfortable with my mission at home (and even homeschooling!) I was called to go out of the home, enroll my kids in school, and be a teacher again.  When this became absolutely clear I cried uncontrollably for an hour.  What had begun as a sacrifice became a sacrifice to surrender.  Christ blessed me however through ways only He can and through His Mystical Body, with the opportunity for all of my kids to attend the school at which I teach so we could still be together in some way during the day. I still rely on Christ to provide the faith, courage, and love to choose His will over the immediate visible rewards that come from my will and already I am seeing the fruits of His next call.

Our utilitarian culture measures worth by achievement.  Love however simply desires connection and time together.  Love bears fruits of good works, but its greatest joy is simply enjoying the nearness and attention of the beloved.  You are Christ’s beloved.  Your love should bear fruit of loving works, but Jesus’ greatest joy is time spent near Him, enjoying His presence.  As Mother Teresa advised, spend time alone with the Lord, and He will pour the love you need in your heart to carry your cross.  Paradoxically, you may find your cross to be your greatest blessing and that in losing your life for the Lord, it will be saved.

Consider:

  •  Consider how much time you spend alone with Christ.
    • What keeps you from making time for silent prayer and listening?
    • How has silent prayer with the Lord deepened your faith?
  • Consider the paradox that no matter how busy we are, if we make time for Christ somehow everything else still gets done.
  • With whom do you enjoy spending time together? Do you take joy in his or her presence even if nothing is being “accomplished”?  Do you know and love each other more deeply as a result?
  • If you have teens, consider the time you spend driving in the car. Often that space of time where you are simply alone in the quiet of the vehicle is when they open up about what’s on their minds or in their hearts.  What is it about a dedicated space of time that cannot be interrupted by tasks that opens people up to one another?
    • Consider how this relates to our relationship with the Lord. How many of us encounter Him during times when we have nowhere else we could go?  What if we simply carved out that time intentionally each day?
  • How has Christ deepened your faith, strengthened your trust, and made you more loving because of your relationship with Him?
  • Have you ever “died to something” in your life only to find that in fact Christ liberated you through it? Have you given something only to find you were given more in return?
  • What might Christ be asking you to surrender today? How might Christ value your contributions more than you do?  Pray for Him to reveal His view of your life and purify your own lens.

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Spend an additional 15 minutes a day this week alone with Jesus.
  • Visit Jesus at adoration one time this week.
  • Read about Christ in the Gospels or a spiritual book. One suggestion would be “Jesus of Nazareth” by Pope Benedict XVI.
  • Take 5 minutes for silent prayer a day.
  • Listen to Christian music once a day – while driving, walking, getting ready etc.
  • Listen to the song “How He Loves Us” by David Crowder Band

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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Why is There Suffering, and What is God Doing About It?…Gospel meditation for June 5th, 2016

by Angela Lambert

Jesus raises widow of Nain's son

June 5th, 2016; 10th Sunday in Ordinary Time

Gospel of Luke 7:11-17 NAB

Jesus journeyed to a city called Nain, and his disciples and a large crowd accompanied him. As he drew near to the gate of the city, a man who had died was being carried out, the only son of his mother, and she was a widow. A large crowd from the city was with her. When the Lord saw her, he was moved with pity for her and said to her, “Do not weep.” He stepped forward and touched the coffin; at this the bearers halted, and he said, “Young man, I tell you, arise!” The dead man sat up and began to speak, and Jesus gave him to his mother. Fear seized them all, and they glorified God, crying out “A great prophet has arisen in our midst,” and “God has visited his people.” This report about him spread through the whole of Judea and in all the surrounding region.

 Meditation Reflection:

Why is there evil in the world?  Why doesn’t God do anything about it? Some persons will answer that either God doesn’t exist or God doesn’t care.  Those persons willing to investigate the question further however, universally discover two things: human free will causes most evils and the person who has consistently done the most to alleviate suffering is God.  Utopian ideologies of the 19th and 20th centuries, endeavoring to eradicate evil through human efforts alone, all ended in countless deaths and totalitarian rule. Sin causes evil and only God can save us from ourselves.  Even death, God has revealed, did not originate with faulty genetics or evolution.  Sickness, death, toil, and pain entered the world through the original sin of Adam and Eve (Genesis 3; Romans 8:19-23).

God created human persons to experience Truth, Goodness, and Beauty.  He designed us to live in perfect friendship with Him and with each other in a unity of love and joy for eternity.    We all experience deep suffering at some point(s) in life.   The woman in this Gospel provides an example of both deep spiritual pain from losing her only son after having already lost her husband, as well as utter material destitution since she would have no legal rights to property or work without a husband or son.  Upon seeing this, Jesus is “moved with pity for her.” When we feel most vulnerable, most alone, and our hearts are breaking, we can look to this passage and take comfort in knowing that Christ is looking on us with pity.  Moreover, this pity moves Him to do something to alleviate our pain.  In this case, Jesus restored the man to life.  In doing so, He restored the woman’s life as well.  Although Christ does not always save those we love from earthly death, this miracle demonstrates His power and His love which brings new life in surprising and supernatural ways.  It also points to the hope that all will be made new in the resurrected life in the kingdom of God.

God became man to dwell among us (John 1:14) and to personally alleviate our suffering through His Word, His touch, and His sacrifice.  As the psalmist proclaims: “The LORD is near to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Ps. 34:18).  Moved with pity, Christ continues to reach directly into our hearts to dry our tears and heal our wounds. He anoints our wounds with grace through His sacraments, He dispels hurtful lies with His divine revelation, He forgives our sins in the sacrament of Confession and fortifies us with grace to overcome them, and He feeds us with His very own body and blood in the Eucharist.  Finally, He unites us as members of His body and extends His hand of mercy through His disciples operating under the direction and love of the Holy Spirit.

Does God care about our suffering?  Is He going to do anything about it?  Yes.  Quite a lot actually, if only you will allow Him.  Christ offers new life if we will accept it.  He offers healing if we turn to Him.  This is the witness of every Christian disciple.

Consider:

  •  Re-read the Gospel and imagine you are one of the persons present.
    • Consider the love of the mother for her only son. Consider her love for her husband as well.  The death of her son means the image of her husband is gone as well as their family together.  In addition, imagine you will now be destitute with no way to provide for yourself.  To your surprise, a man emerges from the crowd and gives your son, your family, your life, back to you.
    • Imagine you are one of the members of the crowd. Why might you be present and how might you be feeling toward the woman?  What would you think of Christ’s miracle?
    • Imagine Christ’s perspective. What does His response reveal about His heart and His character?
  • Consider the definition of pity. Dictionary.com defines it as: “sympathetic or kindly sorrow evoked by the suffering, distress, or misfortune of another, often leading one to give relief or aid or to show mercy.” The heart of Christ felt sorrow at the sight of the woman’s pain and it moved Him to help her.  Imagine Christ seeing you in your pain.  Consider His merciful look of pity which shares your sorrow and desires to bring you comfort.
  • Reflect on a time Christ comforted you or saved you when you were in dire need. Take time to appreciate all that He did and the incredible ways He acted in your life during that time.

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Begin each day with this prayer: “Lord show me the needs around me.  Move my heart with pity and enable me to show mercy to someone today.”
  • Surrender a pain to Christ to heal. Reach out to Him in His Word, His Sacraments, or His Church.  Spend 5 minutes of silence with Christ and your pain.
  • Make a gratitude list of the mercies Christ has shown you over the years and then each day.

 

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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Christ’s gift and a Mother’s gift…Gospel meditation for the Solemnity of the Most Holy Body and Blood of Christ

by Angela Lambert

eucharist and crowd

May 29th, 2016; The Solemnity of the Most Holy Body and Blood of Christ

 Gospel of Luke 9:11b-17 NAB

Jesus spoke to the crowds about the kingdom of God, and he healed those who needed to be cured. As the day was drawing to a close, the Twelve approached him and said, “Dismiss the crowd so that they can go to the surrounding villages and farms and find lodging and provisions; for we are in a deserted place here.” He said to them, “Give them some food yourselves.” They replied, “Five loaves and two fish are all we have, unless we ourselves go and buy food for all these people.” Now the men there numbered about five thousand. Then he said to his disciples, “Have them sit down in groups of about fifty.” They did so and made them all sit down. Then taking the five loaves and the two fish, and looking up to heaven, he said the blessing over them, broke them, and gave them to the disciples to set before the crowd. They all ate and were satisfied. And when the leftover fragments were picked up, they filled twelve wicker baskets.

Meditation Reflection:

Christ loves us with His whole being.  He became man that He might personally uplift our hearts with His truth, extend His hand to heal our wounds, and feed us with His own Body and Blood.  Mothers have the privilege of experiencing this kind of self-gift.  A mother literally shares her body with her child and shares in Christ’s pain at his or her birth.  A mother continues to feed her infant with her own body and tend to the constant needs of her newborn.  As her child grows a mother does everything she possibly can to care for the child’s physical, emotional, and intellectual development.  Mothers take joy when their kids eat and grow, when they can comfort and guide them, and when they can make sure their child knows how loved he or she is.

Christ urges us to trust Him and His love as well.  He soothes us in our worries assuring us of His care:

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you shall eat or what you shall drink, nor about your body, what you shall put on.  Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?  Look at the birds of the air they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not of more value than they?…But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well.” Matthew 6: 25-33)

Today’s Gospel confirms that Jesus cares about our needs, even the basic ones like what’s for dinner. Moreover, He can provide in surprising ways since He can do the miraculous.  The crowd of thousands ate their fill after having spent the day in a deserted place listening to Christ speak about the kingdom.  So many times we try to cure ourselves or numb the pain in ways that only turn out to be self-destructive and leave us hungering.  Instead, we should try reaching out to Christ in prayer and receiving the cure for all our pain in His Eucharistic Body and Blood.

Jesus heals our hearts and frees us from the lies that we allow to burden us.  He forgives our sins and gives us a new start with the grace and hope to be better.  He fortifies us with His strength to persevere and He gently provides rest for our soul with His peace.  He does all of this personally, directly, through His incarnate and immanent presence in the Eucharist.  Christ gave His Body and Blood on the Cross to give birth to our new life.  He instructed us to take and eat of this same Body and Blood which He made the sacrifice of the New Covenant.    The Son of God became man that He might dwell among us and apply His grace to our soul.  Today we honor the gift of His Body and Blood through which He feeds us superabundantly, strengthens us, comforts us, and nourishes our growth.  Through the gift of His most holy Body and Blood, we receive life.  Moreover, He continues to provide this gift that we might grow in health and maturity to the fullness of Christian life in the kingdom of God.

Consider:

  • Imagine you are one of the person’s in the crowd listening to Jesus speak about the kingdom of God and curing all those who needed it.
    • What would you hear Jesus say?
    • From what would He heal you?
    • How might His Truth and His touch free you?
    • Consider how you have this very opportunity at the Mass – to hear Christ preach about the Kingdom through His priest and to touch you through His Eucharistic presence.
  •  Consider how a mother gives of her body for her child.  A mother’s love tends to be a complete self – gift.  Consider how the gift of her very body and blood, given in love,  is a unique way to give of her whole self in imitation of Christ.

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Reflect on the gift of Christ’s most holy Body and Blood on the Cross and in the Eucharist each day this week.
  • Attend a daily Mass this week in addition to the Sunday Mass.
  • Give Christ your own Body through a physical sacrifice. Cheerfully offer Christ your labor of service for your family or work, look for a providential opportunity to serve Christ with your physical efforts, offer your sickness or suffering, or prayerfully consider something to fast from each day.

 

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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The Most Marvelous Mystery! Gospel Meditation for the Solemnity of the Most Holy Trinity

by Angela Lambert

May 22nd, 2016; Solemnity of the Most Trinity 3Holy Trinity

Gospel of John 16:12-15 NAB

Jesus said to his disciples: “I have much more to tell you, but you cannot bear it now. But when he comes, the Spirit of truth, he will guide you to all truth. He will not speak on his own, but he will speak what he hears, and will declare to you the things that are coming. He will glorify me, because he will take from what is mine and declare it to you. Everything that the Father has is mine; for this reason I told you that he will take from what is mine and declare it to you.”

Meditation Reflection:

The mystery of the Trinity transcends our comprehension and its reality cannot be rightly conceived in our imagination.  At the same time, God desired that we know something of His nature and being. Christ revealed this truth during His public ministry since we could not have known it otherwise. Still, we lack understanding without supernatural help and so Jesus explains to His apostles, “I have much more to tell you, but you cannot bear it now. But when he comes, the Spirit of truth, he will guide you to all truth.”  When the Holy Spirit descended on the apostles at Pentecost, He opened their eyes of faith, elevated their understanding, and fortified their courage to believe and proclaim such wonderful truths.

The Holy Spirit continues His work today in our own hearts as well.  We know from Genesis that we image God, but because of sin we struggle to know what that looks like.  Through Baptism however, the Trinity comes to dwell in our very souls.   His image grows within us and begins to radiate more and more brightly in our minds and in our lives to the extent that we cooperate with His gifts.

So what is the Trinity? What did God reveal about Himself? What are we supposed to image?  The Church explains it in this way:

“The Trinity is One. We do not confess three Gods, but one God in three persons, the “consubstantial Trinity”.83 The divine persons do not share the one divinity among themselves but each of them is God whole and entire…” (CCC 253)

“The divine persons are really distinct from one another. “God is one but not solitary.”86 “Father”, “Son”, “Holy Spirit” are not simply names designating modalities of the divine being, for they are really distinct from one another: “He is not the Father who is the Son, nor is the Son he who is the Father, nor is the Holy Spirit he who is the Father or the Son.”87 They are distinct from one another in their relations of origin: “It is the Father who generates, the Son who is begotten, and the Holy Spirit who proceeds.”88 The divine Unity is Triune.” (CCC 254)

The divine persons are relative to one another. Because it does not divide the divine unity, the real distinction of the persons from one another resides solely in the relationships which relate them to one another” (CCC 255)

Understand?  Great!  Just kidding.  I can explain…kind of.  First, we must accept that we cannot fully comprehend or imagine the Trinity so let go of that goal.  However, it does not mean that we can know nothing of the Trinity.  God revealed His Trinitarian reality and so we ought to accept and contemplate this mystery with the help of the Holy Spirit.

First, God is one.  He has one divine nature.  We tend to imagine it divided into three parts but this is where our imagination fails us.  Each person of the Trinity is wholly God.

Secondly, God is three.  Our imagination tries to reconcile this with His oneness by imagining God as having three different modes or faces but being essentially the same.  Not the case.  God is three distinct persons.

So how can God be one and three?  In heaven you will see the face of God and something of this mystery.  This incredible vision will be the source of joy so great that you will have to be supernaturally empowered to take it in without being overcome.  Live a holy life so you can one day have this awesome opportunity!  From Christ’s teachings we know that God’s oneness and threeness reveal that His essence is one of relationship.  God is a relationship of Three Persons.  I mentioned in a prior post that when God created us in His image, He created a family.  A man and a woman become “one flesh” and a child is born who is both of their nature and yet distinct as well.  The union of persons in life-giving love images God who is also a union of persons in life-giving love.  Is it no wonder that Satan’s primary attack against God is directed at His image; thus Satan’s efforts to promote a self-centered individualism in contrast to the other-centered gift of self required for an intimate union of persons?

We cannot imagine God’s Triune nature but we can contemplate it and try to live as an image of it with the help of the Holy Spirit and the graces of the Sacraments.  Baptism unites us to God and each other, the Eucharist nourishes that unity, and Confession reconciles us when we have separated ourselves through sin.  The more we open ourselves to God the more we will see Him.  That process begins on earth and the joy that accompanies it begins here as well.  We can look forward with hope and anticipation to the day that God enables us to see more of Him in heaven and we will be free to sing endless songs of praise and love.

Consider:

  •  Consider your relationship with God the Father.
    • What does it mean to be a son or daughter of God?
      • Consider your dignity as an heir of heaven where your Christ your brother reigns as king and Mary your mother reigns as queen.
      • In a family, each member is irreplaceable. You are an irreplaceable member of God’s family.  You matter to God and to every member of the Christian family.
    • How does that affect the way you see yourself?
    • How does that affect the choices you make?
  • Consider your relationship with God the Son.
    • God became man so you could encounter Him directly. He shared in the human experience so He could be closer to you.  Reflect on times you have encountered Christ.
    • Consider the mysteries of His life – how has He experienced similar sufferings to yours?
    • He still draws near to you today through the Eucharist and His Mystical Body the Church. Reflect on the immanence of Christ in your daily life.
  • Consider your relationship with the Holy Spirit.
    • The Holy Spirit opens our eyes to see Christ and enlightens our understanding to appropriate His teachings.
    • When was a time the Holy Spirit brought comfort and peace to your soul?
    • When was a time He gave you fortitude and perseverance in your Christian walk?
    • When was a time He gave you wisdom to discern the right choice to make when faced with a difficult decision? Invite the Holy Spirit to guide your decisions today as well.

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Take a moment today to appreciate God’s creation.
  • Visit Christ present in the Eucharist.
  • Pray to the Holy Spirit each day to reveal God more to you, and to transform your heart that your life might reveal God more to someone else.

 

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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Holy Spirit, Help Me!…Gospel Meditation for the Feast of Pentecost

by Angela Lambert

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May 15th, 2016; Pentecost

Gospel of John 14:15-16, 23b-26 NAB

Jesus said to his disciples: “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate to be with you always. “Whoever loves me will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our dwelling with him. Those who do not love me do not keep my words; yet the word you hear is not mine but that of the Father who sent me. “I have told you this while I am with you. The Advocate, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you everything and remind you of all that I told you.

 Meditation Reflection:

Christ’s greatest gift to us – the first fruit of all of His suffering, death, and resurrection, the first thing He asks the Father on our behalf from His throne in Heaven – is the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.  In the gift of the Holy Spirit we experience the mystery of the Trinity.  God is one and therefore the Spirit makes Christ present in our soul along with the Father.  At the same time, God is three Persons, and therefore Jesus explains that He must ascend to Heaven so that the Spirit may descend upon us.  Because Christ merited the forgiveness of our sins, His Spirit could begin His work of cleansing us and sanctifying us.  The Spirit applies the healing balm of Christ’s sacrifice to the wounds of our sins and works as fast as we will allow to help us regain spiritual health and freedom.

The Spirit is the primary mover in our conversion.  He prompts us to turn to God, provides the strength to actually make the conversion, sanctifies our souls with the grace of Baptism and the sacraments, then guides the ongoing process of union with Christ.  At the same time, the Spirit requires our cooperation.  We can hasten or hinder His work.  It reminds me of trying to clean the house with my three kids.  Granted, a mother has to come to peace with a certain level of mess if she ever wants to survive motherhood.  At the same time, order and cleanliness lend beauty and peace to a home.  During those times when I attempt to clean everything up and restore order to the house my kids’ cooperation (or lack there of) unavoidably determines the success and timeframe of my effort.  When my kids were little I felt like a gerbil running in it’s wheel.  As soon as I cleaned up one mess I would turn around to find my kids had made another.  If I stopped to read with them or take them outside where they couldn’t mess up the house, I couldn’t clean it up either.   As they got a little older I could finally kick them outside to play while I cleaned inside or “quarantine” off rooms one by one from the kids as they were cleaned.  Still, work was often slowed by needs for water or snacks, complaints and fighting, etc.  My kids are now at an age where these challenges remain but they are old enough to pitch in and help. Our life is busier with activities and the house gets neglected by our rush in and out.  As a result, on days where we are all home I will tell the kids “We all have to work together for one hour and we can get everything back in order.”  I remind them that I can no longer do it on my own and I need their help.  I am amazed at how the house can turn around so fast when everyone pitches in.  That’s not to say that I don’t take the opportunity to clean when they are all away from the house and I can get things done uninterruptedly.  However, I’ve learned that I have to employ their help on a more regular basis with the schedule of the new stage we’re in.

Similarly, the Holy Spirit can work in our souls to the extent that we cooperate.  When our faith is still immature we tend to act like little kids – creating one mess after another.  We may feel like progress is slow and that God isn’t doing very much.  However, we need to be honest about our expectations.  Every parent who has ever stayed at home with the kids knows how hard they work all day with nothing visible to show for it.  The other parent may leave for work and return with the house looking the same or worse than when they left.  However, what’s not reflected in that picture is the hundreds of other messes cleaned up constantly, the love and nurturing that took place, and the work at developing a child’s heart and mind.  The Spirit works in our souls in a similar way – drawing our minds up to God, comforting us in our sorrows, forming our conscience, encouraging us, and cleaning up our constant messes.

As we mature in the faith we become less of a hindrance to the Spirit and He works more efficiently in our soul.  As we become less attached to sin the messes slow (some) and the Spirit can make greater progress teaching us about Christ and deepening our love.

Finally, the mature Christian cooperates with the Holy Spirit in the work of following Christ and grows quickly in union with God.  The Sacrament of Confirmation celebrates this as we receive an increase in the Holy Spirit and prepare to be soldiers of Christ, contributors to the faith we have received.

It’s natural for children to depend on their parents more heavily when they are young.  It’s also an expectation that they contribute to family life as they get older.  The Holy Spirit makes us adopted sons and daughters of the Lord.  Through His indwelling we experience the nurturing necessary for sanctification and mature love of God.  Moreover, He blesses us with gifts to strengthen and nurture the faith of others.

May we all this Pentecost, reflect on the gracious work of God in our lives, that others may say of us as the crowd did in Acts 2:11“we hear them speaking in our own tongues of the mighty acts of God.”

Consider:

  • Consider your cooperation with the Holy Spirit.
    • Ask the Holy Spirit to show you habitual sins you struggle with and pray for His help to overcome them.
    • Consider how you can grow in virtue so that the Holy Spirit can act even more powerfully within you. The virtue of purity especially increases the Holy Spirit.
  • Christ calls the Holy Spirit the “Paraclete.” Consider each of the meanings of Paraclete – “advocate”, “intercessor”, “teacher, “helper”, “comforter”.
    • When has the Holy Spirit advocated on your behalf? Consider the sins you have been freed from because the Holy Spirit advocated for you before the Father.  Consider a time when you need the Holy Spirit to advocate for you in the heart of another person.
    • The Spirit intercedes for us and teaches us how to pray.  Thank the Holy Spirit for His prayers on your behalf.  Spend 5 minutes of silent prayer just letting the Holy Spirit speak for you to God.
    • Ask the Holy Spirit to open your mind and heart to God’s word in Scripture. Ask Him to help you see God’s truth in the events of your daily life.  Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal Christ to you.
    • Consider a time the Holy Spirit gave you profound peace when you were suffering and in pain. Invite the Holy Spirit to bring His comfort now and for the grace to turn to Him first.
  • Paul tells us in I Corinthians 12 that the Spirit bestows different gifts upon Christians for the upbuilding of the whole body. Read I Corinthinas 12 and pray about what your gift is and how you can put it at the service of Christ.

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Each day this week ask the Holy Spirit to open your eyes to the presence of Christ, to your sins, and to God’s will.
  • Determine one way to grow in the virtue of purity and do it each day this week.
  • Ask the Holy Spirit for the opportunity to serve God with the gifts He has given you. Then take that opportunity each day.
  • Each day, take a minute to praise God for His mighty works in your life.

 

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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Longing For Nearness to the One We Love…Scripture Meditation for the Solemnity of the Ascension of Christ

by Angela Lambert

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May 8th, 2016; Feast of the Ascension

A reading from Acts of the Apostles 1:1-11 (NAB)

In the first book, Theophilus, I dealt with all that Jesus did and taught until the day he was taken up, after giving instructions through the Holy Spirit to the apostles whom he had chosen. He presented himself alive to them by many proofs after he had suffered, appearing to them during forty days and speaking about the kingdom of God. While meeting with them, he enjoined them not to depart from Jerusalem, but to wait for “the promise of the Father about which you have heard me speak; for John baptized with water, but in a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.” When they had gathered together they asked him, “Lord, are you at this time going to restore the kingdom to Israel?” He answered them, “It is not for you to know the times or seasons that the Father has established by his own authority. But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, throughout Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” When he had said this, as they were looking on, he was lifted up, and a cloud took him from their sight. While they were looking intently at the sky as he was going, suddenly two men dressed in white garments stood beside them. They said, “Men of Galilee, why are you standing there looking at the sky? This Jesus who has been taken up from you into heaven will return in the same way as you have seen him going into heaven.”

 Meditation Reflection:

Jesus spent forty days with the apostles before ascending to Heaven.  During that time He proved He wasn’t a hallucination or a ghost.  He ate with them, spoke with them, embraced them, and even let Thomas put his finger in the wound mark in His side.  Having finished preparing the apostles to lead on earth, Christ ascended to reign in glory by the Father’s right hand in Heaven.  The apostles were left staring at the sky wondering what to do next.  Christ gave them instructions to wait and promised to send the Holy Spirit who would teach them all they needed and so God could dwell not merely with them as He had been the last few years, but within them.  Two angels appear assuring them Christ would return and the apostles then waited in hope and longing.

The twelve experienced a tension every Christian in love with Christ faces.  They belonged to two worlds – their hearts remained with Christ but their bodies remained on earth.  Christians are not dualists however.  Christ remained present in a real and substantial way with His Church and His followers dwell with Him in Heaven even while on this earthly sojourn just in an incomplete way.  St. Augustine expressed this beautifully in a sermon that is read today in the Office of Readings:

For just as He remained with us even after His ascension, so too we are already in heaven with Him, even though what is promised us has not yet been fulfilled in our bodies.  Christ is now exalted above the heavens, but He still suffers on earth all the pain that we, the members of His body have to bear…Why do we on earth not strive to find rest with Him in heaven even now, through faith, hope, and love that unites us to Him?  While in heaven He is also with us; and we while on earth are with Him.”  St. Augustine – sermon; office of readings for the Solemnity of the Ascension of the Lord

Christ didn’t abandon us when He ascended but rather He enabled Himself to be even closer to us.  Through the indwelling of the Trinity, made possible through Baptism by the suffering, death, resurrection, and ascension of Christ, He is no longer limited by space and time as He was when He walked the earth.  During His public ministry, Christ often longed to stay at a place and continue His work, but had to move on to bring the Gospel to other.  Now, reigning in Heaven and dwelling in His followers, He can be nearer to us than ever.  Suffering with us, comforting us, rejoicing with us.

Moreover, St. Paul teaches that the Church is the Mystical Body of Christ with Christ as the head and His members as His body.  As a result we truly experience the grace and love of the Lord run through our veins and He experiences our joys and sufferings as well.  Every member of the body matters and every pain is endured by the whole body.  Stub a toe or break even a finger and everything seems to be affected.  Moreover, it seems as though when we have pain our brain can barely see past it without intentional effort.  Paul knew this reality intimately since Christ personally accused Paul of persecuting Him when he was persecuting the Christians.  In the same way, the health of the mind and the health of the body have a positive effect on all the members.  Making time to simply eat right, exercise some, get rest, and feed the mind energizes the whole person.

It may feel like a huge chasm between earth and heaven, but the only canyon separating the two is sin.  Because of Christ’s Paschal Mystery which merited Redemption for us, every person who seeks Him can find Him and everyone who wishes to remain in Him can do so through membership in His Mystical Body.  The sacraments provide a real and substantial connection between heaven and earth, the invisible and the visible, the perfect and the trainees.

Even the smallest separation can be intensely painful however depending upon the degree of love.  For instance, the more Teresa of Avila experienced union with Christ, despite having extraordinary gifts of rapture and brief moments of spiritual ecstasy, the more painful it became to endure everyday life without the intimate vision of the Lord.  Many saints speak of the same longing and even viewed death as a gift, their marriage to the Lord being fulfilled by crossing the threshold of their home together.

Our union with Christ will be fulfilled in heaven but it begins now.  We can be with Him as much as we allow Him to dwell within us and as much as we seek Him out in prayer and Sacraments.  Moreover, in this Year of Mercy, we are reminded that “whatsoever you do to the least of these, you do unto Me.”  Mother Teresa sought the Lord she loved in the poorest of the poor.  If you miss Christ and want to be near Him, you will find Him dwelling within you and in the poor around you, even those in your own home or workplace.

Consider:

  •  In what ways do you experience the beginning of heaven here on earth? (Remember heaven is union with God, joy and peace in His presence, enjoying the fellowship of loved ones…)
  • In what ways is heaven still distant?
  • Have you ever experienced the bittersweet pain of being physically apart from someone you love for a time? How did that distance deepen your relationship?  How did it feel when it was over and you could be together?
    • Consider your relationship with Christ in the same way. You can talk, relate, and love each other, but there remains a longing for being together in both body and spirit and being able to see each other.
    • Consider how the sacraments provide a real experience of heaven touching earth, of physically being near to the one you love.

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Spend time with Christ in prayer each day or at daily Mass.
  • Intentionally look for Christ in those around you. Seek His face in the poor (especially the spiritually poor).  Do one act of love and kindness toward Christ through one of His members.
  • Each day begin by recalling: “This isn’t heaven. I have to wait.  But the more Christ dwells in me, the more heavenly this earth will be.”

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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Attainable Unconditional Love…Gospel Meditation for the 6th Week of Easter

by Angela Lambert

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May 1st, 2016; 6th Sunday of Easter

Gospel John 14:23-29

Jesus said to his disciples: “Whoever loves me will keep my word, and my Father will love him,
and we will come to him and make our dwelling with him. Whoever does not love me does not keep my words; yet the word you hear is not mine but that of the Father who sent me. “I have told you this while I am with you. The Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you everything and remind you of all that I told you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid. You heard me tell you, ‘I am going away and I will come back to you.’
If you loved me, you would rejoice that I am going to the Father; for the Father is greater than I.
And now I have told you this before it happens, so that when it happens you may believe.”

Meditation Reflection:

“As the world gives” tends to leave a person bitter and disillusioned.  It begins with promises of security and pleasure but lacks real permanency or loyalty.  After awhile we even struggle to relax during periods of calm, worrying that it won’t endure long.    Nothing seems to last and this causes anxiety in good times and in bad.

The philosopher Pascal lamented that man is but a feeble reed, easily brought to its end by the smallest ailment.  Most of our lives, he asserts, are spent trying to distract ourselves from the unsettling dread we feel when we take time to think about the purpose of our lives or the reality of our mortality.  He concludes that this universal experience supports the fact that happiness can be found in God alone:

“All men seek happiness. This is without exception…And yet after such a great number of years, no one without faith has reached the point to which all continually look. All complain, princes and subjects, noblemen and commoners, old and young, strong and weak, learned and ignorant, healthy and sick, of all countries, all times, all ages, and all conditions…A trial so long, so continuous, and so uniform, should certainly convince us of our inability to reach the good by our own efforts.” Pascal Pensees

Pope Francis observed that we have created an entire “throwaway culture,” marked by the readiness to discard even relationships and people as soon as they become inevitably difficult.  Consequently, he says, people begin to despair and make the assumption that they will never experience unconditional love.  Because they have never experienced mercy, they conclude that they never will.  As a result, they struggle in the darkness of sin, feeling alone and without the possibility of healing.

The fragility of our era is this,  too:  we don’t believe that there is a chance for redemption; for a hand to raise you up; for an embrace to save you, forgive you, pick you up, flood you with infinite, patient, indulgent love; to put you back on your feet.  We need mercy.” Pope Francis, The Name of God is Mercy

Christ however offers the peace every human soul longs for – permanent, deep, and healing.  Moreover, we do not have to chase after it like a greyhound that will never catch the rabbit.  Rather, Christ bestows His peace freely as a fruit of His unconditional love.  To receive this peace we merely need to enter into a relationship of love with Him. Relationship with Christ is merciful and enduring.  Jesus doesn’t throw us away when we become difficult or even when we betray Him. He persists in pursuing us, binding our wounds, and transforming our hearts. His greatest pain, he revealed to St. Faustina, is our lack of trust in Him.  To Mother Teresa, He said, “I thirst”; meaning He thirsts for our souls and relationship with us.

Relationships are risky – they require two people to both freely choose to love one another.  No matter how faithful, how loving, how sacrificial one partner is willing to be, if the other walks away the relationship ends.  Christ is the ultimate risk taker.  He loves us no matter what, even if that love is unrequited.  Moreover, the partner who walks away suffers the greatest loss because he or she closes himself off from the riches of the other partner’s love.  When we walk away from Christ, we close ourselves off from the love He longs to bestow upon us.

Jesus offers peace, love, and joy.  All we must do is live in a loving relationship with Christ.  To do this He says, we must follow His commands.  We live in a wounded world confused about authentic love.  Jesus teaches us through His commands and offers the perfect example for us to imitate.

We can chase after the illusion of love or embrace the God who is love.  If we choose the latter, God will dwell within us and our joy will be complete.  It feels more risky because it’s harder to see at first. Ultimately however, it’s the soundest reality and truest love.

Consider:

  • Jesus says, “Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid.” What do you allow to cause you anxiety and fear?  Surrender each thing to the Lord and entrust your concerns to Him.
  • Reflect on the love of Christ. Consider the freedom and joy experienced by the saints in every generation for the last two thousand years.
  • Reflect on how Christ has blessed you over the course of your life. Then reflect on how He has blessed you this week. What needs has He met?  What has He conquered for you?  When have you felt the embrace of His love?  When have you experienced His beauty or glory?

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Examine your day each night or morning.  Thank God for His blessings.  Recognize when He came to your aid.  Identify when you failed to love Christ or your neighbor and ask for Jesus’ help to do better the next day.

 

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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Receiving Christ’s Gift Graciously…Gospel Meditation for Palm Sunday

by Angela Lambert

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Blessed be the LORD, Who has shown me the wonders of His love.” Psalm 31:22

 March 20th, 2016; Palm Sunday

Gospel of Luke 22:14-23:56

Since the reading is so lengthy, click this link to the passage: Gospel of Luke 22:14-23:56

Meditation Reflection:

Today marks the beginning of Holy Week. I will write another post about the significance of this week’s liturgies, especially the Easter Triduum (Holy Thursday, Good Friday, and the Easter Vigil). For now however I want to focus on today – Palm Sunday. The Gospel follows Christ through the events of His Paschal Mystery beginning with His final entrance into Jerusalem and culminating in His death.

Three weeks ago I referenced the Pope’s theology of sin (“Living in Denial” 2/28/16). He teaches that the process of conversion begins with acknowledging our sin, confessing it with contrition to the Lord, then trusting in Christ’s mercy to forgive and heal us. As we unite ourselves to Christ this week, remembering the events of His suffering let us contemplate the third aspect of conversion – trusting gratitude for Christ’s mercy.

In the Office of Readings for today, a sermon by St. Andrew of Crete (d. 740), a bishop, offers a beautiful idea for how to honor Christ today…

So let us spread before his feet, not garments or soulless olive branches, which delight the eye for a few hours and then wither, but ourselves, clothed in his grace, or rather, clothed completely in him. We who have been baptized into Christ must ourselves be the garments that we spread before him. Now that the crimson stains of our sins have been washed away in the saving waters of baptism and we have become white as pure wool, let us present the conqueror of death, not with mere branches of palms but with the real rewards of his victory. Let our souls take the place of the welcoming branches as we join today in the children’s holy song: Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord. Blessed is the king of Israel. http://divineoffice.org/lent-hw-sun-or/?date=20160320

This response inspires us to approach holy week with an attitude of deep appreciation; to follow the footsteps of the suffering Christ and feel the grace of His mercy accomplished through His sacrificial love. Numerous Gospel accounts tell of Pharisees or Sadducees wanting to kill Jesus but being unable. Christ could have escaped the Cross, it was within His power. He chose to surrender Himself which was the only reason they could apprehend Him. He chose to suffer as the sacrifice for our sins for the sole purpose of our redemption – to be freed from slavery to sin and death, to experience healing and supernatural strength, to experience union with God as His beloved children, and that our “joy may be full” (Jn 15:11).

Reflecting on Christ’s suffering however, especially if we have the courage to connect it to our own weakness and personal sins, requires more than a small amount of humility. It means we realize our dependence (something we hate in our culture) and our unworthiness. Christ endured things we could not and when asked to offer back something trivial in return we often fail.   How many of us sigh at the length of the reading on Palm Sunday, and yet how much easier to read it than to live it! How much longer it was for Christ to actually endure the events we recall.

Distracted thoughts and limited attention spans will always burden due to our weakened nature from original sin. We can work to minimize our distractions however and lengthen our attention by replacing our thoughts about everyday matters with thoughts of God through regular spiritual reading or listening to Catholic talk radio. We can replace worldly images in our imagination with images of Christ through praying the psalms and listening to Christian music. Rather than secular songs interrupting our prayer, over time Christian songs may interrupt our mundane tasks.

This Holy Week, let’s do our best to, as St. Andrew suggested, lay our transformed selves before Christ. Let us ease His suffering with songs of praise and thanksgiving. Let us offer Him hope on the Cross by demonstrating that His sacrifice would bear much fruit in our lives.  Be a gracious receiver by using the gift Christ gave you to live a holy and joyful life.

Consider:

  • Take time to reflect on those things Christ has conquered in your life – sin, addiction, lies you had believed, fears, pride, loneliness, despair…
  • Examine areas of your life in need of Christ. Imagine His blood washing over them and healing them. Invite Him to free you in that area as a grace of this Holy Week. Resolve to cooperate with Him in this effort.
  • Sacrifice is the proof of love. Christ would have suffered every pain for you alone.

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Pray the Stations of the Cross.
  • Pray a psalm of thanksgiving each day for God’s help.
  • Pray psalm 21, the psalm Jesus quoted from the Cross when He said, “My God My God, why have you abandoned Me.”
  • Listen to Christian radio on your drive or as you get ready in the morning.
    • Ideas: local Christian music stations; download the Relevant Radio app and listen to Catholic programming.
  • Offer encouragement to someone who is suffering.
  • Offer mercy to someone in thanksgiving for Christ’s mercy to you.

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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Strength in the Lord…Gospel Meditation for Feb.14th, 2016

by Angela Lambert

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Gospel Luke 4:1-13

Filled with the Holy Spirit, Jesus returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the desert for forty days, to be tempted by the devil. He ate nothing during those days, and when they were over he was hungry. The devil said to him, “If you are the Son of God, command this stone to become bread.” Jesus answered him, “It is written, One does not live on bread alone.” Then he took him up and showed him all the kingdoms of the world in a single instant. The devil said to him, “I shall give to you all this power and glory; for it has been handed over to me, and I may give it to whomever I wish. All this will be yours, if you worship me.” Jesus said to him in reply, “It is written: You shall worship the Lord, your God, and him alone shall you serve.” Then he led him to Jerusalem, made him stand on the parapet of the temple, and said to him, “If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down from here, for it is written: He will command his angels concerning you, to guard you, and: With their hands they will support you, lest you dash your foot against a stone.” Jesus said to him in reply, “It also says, You shall not put the Lord, your God, to the test.” When the devil had finished every temptation, he departed from him for a time.

Meditation Reflection:

Directly after His Baptism, before He begins His public work, Jesus is first led by the Spirit into the desert to fast, pray, and face temptation. In the same way, the Holy Spirit periodically draws us away from the noise of life and the distractions of the senses to be able to connect with God in a deeper interior way. In some cases we choose to place ourselves in quiet reflection by going on a retreat or planning a weekend of solitude. At other times, the circumstances of life create solitude for us.

It reminds me of standing ankle-deep in the waves of the ocean on the beach. As the water cascades over my feet it carries with it a flurry of sand, shells, sea-weed, and teems with life and energy. Then it recedes, drawing back everything it had just placed before me. Even the sand around my feet recedes leaving me only two small mounds beneath my arches. These times can feel lonely and a little barren like the desert. However, they can be opportunities for prayer and preparation for the next mission God has for us when the water will return again replenished and shimmering.

The devil of course hates for us to follow Christ and he especially despises when we build the kingdom of God. He therefore attempts to derail us in any way possible. He prevents us from God’s work in a myriad of ways tailored to our own personal weaknesses. The devil distracts us with physical pleasures and the lie that if we don’t satisfy our body’s whims and desires we will die, or at least be so miserable it’s not worth living! Giving up sweets, pop, alcohol, snacking, over-sleeping, staying up to late, etc. during Lent help to strengthen our will over our body.

Next the devil tries to redirect the trajectory of our work by aiming our talents at building the kingdom of self rather than the kingdom of God. He tempted Jesus with the enticing offer to be king without the cross. He lures us to avoid suffering and seek success.

Lastly, if both of these tactics are thwarted the devil twists God’s own words and tries to skew our relationship with the Lord. The devil hates the Church because Christ gave it His authority to preach truth by the power of the Holy Spirit. If we listen to the Holy Spirit through Christ’s Church the devil loses his power to trick us “and will depart for a time”.

If we pay careful attention, we can learn the tricks of the devil in our own lives. St. Ignatius of Loyola began to notice this too and developed rules of discernment that have become a classic in the Christian life. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you grow in self-knowledge and provide the grace to overcome temptation so as to live in the freedom of the kingdom of God and work unhindered for His glory.

Consider:

  • Spend some time in prayer reflecting on your average day. Consider what things unnecessarily slow you down, distract you, make you late, frustrate your work, or prevent you from getting started on something. Implement a plan to combat one of them.
  • Consider the three categories of temptations from the Gospel today and how each one applies to you. This Lent build strength by combating the pleasure that has a hold over you, the suffering you are trying to avoid or the status you are trying to achieve, and grow in knowledge of your faith to protect you from the deceptions of the devil.
  • Look back on your life and reflect on how God prepared you before raising you up for something. How did you feel beforehand and after? Have you experienced deeper and richer faith after a time of solitude or difficulty?

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Commit to a Lenten resolution even if you fail at it periodically. Give something up and/or do something extra to strengthen your relationship with Christ and weaken your relationship with sin.
  • Read (or listen to the audiobook) C.S. Lewis’ Screwtape Letters. It’s short, entertaining, and enlightening. It’s a satirical work which features letters from an experienced demon to a lesser experienced one about how to tempt humans.
  • Listen to Fr. Timothy Gallagher’s podcasts on St. Ignatius’ discernment of spirits. He presents Ignatius’s ideas in an understandable and relatable way. It will aid you in understanding your everyday experiences and how they relate to the spiritual life.

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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Who Me?!… Gospel Meditation for Sunday February 7th, 2016

by Angela Lambert

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February 7th, 2016; 4th Sunday in Ordinary Time

Gospel Luke 5:1-11

While the crowd was pressing in on Jesus and listening to the word of God, he was standing by the Lake of Gennesaret. He saw two boats there alongside the lake; the fishermen had disembarked and were washing their nets. Getting into one of the boats, the one belonging to Simon, he asked him to put out a short distance from the shore. Then he sat down and taught the crowds from the boat. After he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Put out into deep water and lower your nets for a catch.” Simon said in reply, “Master, we have worked hard all night and have caught nothing, but at your command I will lower the nets.” When they had done this, they caught a great number of fish and their nets were tearing. They signaled to their partners in the other boat to come to help them. They came and filled both boats so that the boats were in danger of sinking. When Simon Peter saw this, he fell at the knees of Jesus and said, “Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man.” For astonishment at the catch of fish they had made seized him and all those with him, and likewise James and John, the sons of Zebedee, who were partners of Simon. Jesus said to Simon, “Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching men.” When they brought their boats to the shore, they left everything and followed him.

Meditation Reflection:

I often find myself torn between two emotions. Like Simon Peter my encounter with Christ leaves me astonished with a strong desire to leave everything and follow Him so I can hang on His every word and witness His great works. I want to call out “Pick me! Pick me!” At the same time, when Christ actually calls me to follow Him and participate in His mission, I feel so ridiculous because of my smallness that all I can say is “Who me? Really? Are you certain? Uh oh…” It’s one thing to watch Christ, it’s completely another to be invited to work side by side with Him. I don’t mind blending into the crowd of admirers, but I know what Christ can do through His followers and I feel foolishly unqualified.

Every Christian who has encountered Christ and heard His call struggles with the same emotions. Pick up any account of the life of a saint and they articulate the same tension. Don’t mistake their words for false modesty. The saints knew precisely the greatness of God and their own ineptitude. The only difference is that they had the humility and courage to say yes to God anyway.

Today’s first and second reading give us two such examples. Isaiah (6:1-8) reacts to seeing the glory of the Lord with fear due to his own sinfulness and feelings of being unworthy. God doesn’t disagree with him because Isaiah’s response is appropriate and true. Rather God heals Isaiah and enables him to serve God by having an angel touch Isaiah’s mouth with an ember from God’s altar.   Isaiah’s first words of “Woe is me I am doomed” change to “Here I am, send me”. St. Paul recounts having a similar experience (1 Corinthians 15:1-11). He humbly acknowledges that he of all people has no right to be called an apostle because he began by persecuting the Church. I have to think that not a day went by that Paul did not recall being present at St. Stephen’s martyrdom as a witness on the side of the persecutors. To accept Christ’s call to serve as an apostle had to have required great humility on Paul’s part and a deep trust in the mercy of Christ. Paul was willing to change teams and look like a fool by accepting a leadership position because He decided to say yes to Christ anyway.

Fr. Francis Fernandez-Carvajal, author of many works on the spiritual life, notes that the devil often tries to discourage us from great aspirations by tricking us with false humility. Drawing from Teresa of Avila, he writes in his book Through Wind and Waves,

St. Teresa of Avila, after stressing that the struggle for holiness is grounded on God’s help, and hence the importance of being humble, warns of the danger of a false humility that is short on desire and low in aspirations. The saint says regarding true humility: ‘It is necessary that we know what this humility is like. I believe that the devil harms people who practice prayer and prevents them from advancing by causing them to misunderstand humility. He makes it appear to us that it’s pride to have great desires and want to imitate the saints and long to be martyrs. Then he tells us or causes us to think that since we are sinners the deeds of the saints are for our admiration, not our imitation.’ This false humility leads to spiritual mediocrity, so opposed to the true Christian vocation.”

Although we legitimately feel unworthy, answering Christ’s call demonstrates faith and trust in the merciful love of God. Shrinking from service because of our smallness is not humble it’s mediocre, and mediocrity is not the response to grace that Christ deserves.

Christ calls every Christian to share in His work of saving souls. It’s natural to respond with an astonished “Who, me?!” However, as Pope St. John Paul II exhorted us, we should cling to Christ’s words “Be not afraid”. Push aside the temptation of false humility and step forward in faith to say as Isaiah did, “Here I am, send me”.

Consider:

  • When, like Peter or Isaiah, have you been astonished by Christ?
  • What is Christ asking of you today?
  • What fears or insecurities are holding you back?
  • Do you believe Christ will do great things through you or do you doubt His mercy?

Make a Resolution (Practical Application):

  • Each day this week ask Christ in prayer, “What do you want of me today? Here I am, send me.”
  • Pray the litany of humility prayer each day. It asks Christ to deliver us from the desires and fears that tend to become extreme in us and prevent us from freedom in following Christ.
O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.

From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being loved, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being extolled, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being honored, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being praised, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being preferred to others, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being consulted, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being approved, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being humiliated, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being despised, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of suffering rebukes, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being calumniated, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being forgotten, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being ridiculed, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being wronged, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the fear of being suspected, Deliver me, Jesus.

That others may be loved more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be chosen and I set aside Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be praised and I unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

Rafael Cardinal Merry del Val (1865-1930),
Secretary of State for Pope Saint Pius X

 

~ Written by Angela Lambert © 2016

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